Hardcore Baptist Pick-up Lines
By Scott La Counte
Baby, you’re like a burning bush. I feel like Moses, all I want is a glimpse of the Promised Land.
You look like the whore of Babylon—and I mean that in a good way. READ MORE...
01.25.2008 | Comments(80)If I Were God
By Adam Kenyon
If I were God, when people said things like “Too much information!” and “You know what I’m talkin’ ‘bout?” and "Don't go there!" and “Booyah!” it would be sharply painful both for the speaker and for anyone who laughed or chuckled as if it were funny. READ MORE...
01.22.2008 | Comments(17)Christian Music Acts You May Have Missed
By Dale Dobson
Morton’s Tabernacle Choir
This fifty-member choral group billed itself as “Cheaper Than the Brand Name Tabernacle Choir!” Many listeners heartily agreed, while others attempted to collect damages for pain and suffering. READ MORE...
01.17.2008 | Comments(6)
God Deleted From Worship, Replaced With Ricky Ricardo
Professors at Dallas Theological Seminary published a position paper Tuesday eliminating the concept of “God” and/or “Lord” from Christian worship and replacing it with worship of the Bible only. READ MORE...
01.16.2008 | Comments(50)Carpet Cleaners United by Christ, Synthetic Fibers
By Jon Erickson
From Guideposts ...
Once thought to be irreconcilably split over the true meaning of life, carpet cleaners from across the country have been brought together by the Sinner’s Prayer. READ MORE...
01.14.2008 | Comments(0)
Greeks Protest Cameron's Next Religious Exposé
By Chris Mikesell
SPANAKOPITA, GREECE—This small town on the island of Crete was thrown into turmoil, October 21, when James Cameron announced his next documentary project. On the heels of his Lost Tomb of Jesus film, the producer of The Terminator and Titanic has begun filming Olympus: Mountain or Molehill? READ MORE...
01.13.2008 | Comments(2)Ted Haggard Pinched My Butt
The Rehab Diary of Ted's Therapist
By Todd Outcalt
January 2, 2007
We met with Ted for the first time last night. He seemed in good spirits, though his eyes were a bit bloodshot and he cast a few flirtatious glances toward Jack. READ MORE...
Aliens in Our Midst Visitor Response Plan
By Kathy Harris-Zmudka
Are you wasting valuable time at Elder/Deacon meetings brainstorming new ways to embarrass first-time guests? Time that could be used brainstorming new ways to embarrass, torture, and bore the youth? READ MORE...
01.09.2008 | Comments(13)
KitschKorp Presents... My Messiah-Matic
By Dale Dobson
Illustration by Jim Siergey
For more than 2000 years, discerning Christians everywhere have searched in vain, seeking spiritual merchandise that expresses their very own, personal faith.
Now - at last - KitschKorp proudly presents this amazing, new faith-in-action figure! READ MORE...